Bar Jokes
What are some funny “walked into a bar” jokes?
Do you know any? I have already heard the one that says “a man walked into a bar and said ow” one. Any joke that involves somebody/thing walking into a bar.
A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walked into a bar.
The bartender looked up and said, “What is this, some kind of joke?”
René Descartes walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, “What’ll it be, buddy, ya want a beer?”
Descartes answered, “I think NOT,” and
A neutron walked into a bar and ordered a drink. “How much,” he asked the bartender.
The bartender replied, “For you? No charge.”
A horse walked into the bar and ordered a beer.
“Sure,” replied the bartender, “but why the long face…?”
A termite walked into a bar and asked, “Is the bar tender here?”
A battery walked into a bar and ordered a beer.
“Okay,” said the bartender, “but don’t start anything…”
A bear walked into the bar and ordered a beer.
“We don’t serve bears here,” said the bartender.
“Don’t you see these fangs and these claws?” replied the bear. “I said give me a beer.”
“You don’t scare me,” said the bartender, “so get out.”
The bear answered, “If you don’t give me a beer, I’m going to rip up this woman next to me.”
“Tough,” said the bartender.
So the bear proceeded to rip into the woman and tear her to shreds. With blood, flesh, and bits of torn clothing hanging from his claws and teeth, the bear demanded, “Now what about that beer?”
The bartender told the bear, “Nope, we don’t serve drug addicts, either.”
“Drug addict???” exclaimed the bear, “What the hell are you talking about???”
The bartender pointed to the dead woman and replied, “Wasn’t that a bar-bítch-you-ate?”
bar jokes
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The Hit List $7.98 Cole Hauser is having a very bad day. He heads down to the local bar to drown his sorrows and befriends a mysterious stranger (Cuba Gooding, Jr.). While intoxicated, Hauser comes up with a list of five people he would like to see dead, but his day gets much worse when those on his wish list start to turn up murdered. Will he be able to end the killing spree before it’s too late? Jonathan LaPaglia,… |
